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My son has ADHD and Bi-Polar. On most days I feel like I am going to lose my mind. Perry just came home after spending 18 months in foster care. He was gone so long that I forgot what every day was like with him. Sometimes I get so mad and frustrated with him that we end up in a yelling match, which no one wins.
I read a lot about the disorders that he has and try and get suggestions on how to deal with him better and try to keep myself relaxed in the meantime.
I started this new strategy that Perry loves and I suggest all these parents out there with children like Perry do the same. I got a composition book to use as a journal. Every day we write to each other in a form of a letter. He can say anything he wasn’t without any repercussions. I don’t care if he uses foul language or threatens to kill us. As long as he is writing down his feelings, he should not act out on these feelings. I write back to him every day.
I started to do this just so we can keep the lines of communication open between us. I use it to praise him and tell him how proud of him I am. I also write about how the evening went. For example, yesterday we had a really rough day; fighting, cussing and throwing things; I will write about this behavior in my letter today to tell him how disappointed I am of this behavior. I will also suggest different alternatives in hopes that it will sink in to his brain and he act begin to think before he acts.
I am not delusional in thinking that this will help in any way shape or form. I simply hope that it will have some benefit that I am seeking. Only time will tell though.
In doing this journaling it also gives him something to look forward to. I know this won’t work for everyone but it is worth a try, isn’t it? If anything it might give you five minutes of peace while your child is reading and writing.
I know there are other parents and children that are struggling and we need to support each other for the sake of our sanity as well as our kids. Parents often feel alone, I know I do, often! I just have to remind myself that I am not alone.